Hey everybody, I’m Anne-Marie Michaelis, a Christian author and coach. Welcome to the Hidden Battles Podcast, a weekly podcast about the hidden battles of spiritual warfare and the struggles that go on in our minds and hearts, and the truth to overcoming these hidden battles. My life was radically transformed during a supernatural encounter with Jesus.

God allowed my eyes to be spiritually opened long enough to see the truth of these hidden battles and to scare the rebellion against him right out of me. In each episode, I share a true story about a real life experience, a teaching, and a final takeaway. This podcast will reveal the hidden battles that lurk in our minds and hearts, and the way out.

Hidden Battles, revealing what the enemy does not want you to know. Please take a moment to follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and subscribe to my channel on YouTube, at GodDesign LLC. Podcasts are available on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts.

For a free download of my memoir, visit my website at goddesign.org.

Today in this introduction episode, I’ll be sharing an abbreviated version of my story. As much of my story will unfold throughout each podcast episode. I’ll share where I was headed and how I got there, what scared the rebellion out of me, and my miraculous story of how I was radically transformed by Jesus.

I’ll go into the scripture that gives us the heads up that Satan blinds us with a veil, why and how, and the only one that can remove the blinders or the veil. Then I ask you to consider how this applies to your life, as we are all to some degree blinded, even if we call ourselves Christians. As these podcasts unfold, I’ll dive into specific stories and dig deeper into various topics, but for this first introduction episode, this will be more of a summary of my story.

Here is the summary of my life before Jesus, or as I call it now, my life when I was blinded. I learned the hard way that no one is immune, not a girl with eight years of Catholic school and years of religion class under her belt, a girl that was baptized as a baby, did her communion and confirmation, and was all set and checked all the checkboxes nice and neatly before starting my life and starting my thing. Nope, no one is immune to this battle.

The question is, are we aware that we are even in a battle? A battle that steals our identity, steals our purpose, and ultimately steals our soul. A battle that seems to start out so silently, and sometimes remains so and goes unnoticed.

A battle for our mind and heart and ultimately our life. So looking back at my childhood, I would have to say there was a glaring turning point when I was 11 years old, in which Satan would put his marker in my life and set the tone for many years to come. This was one of many footholds that would turn into numerous strongholds in my mind and heart.

I was sexually assaulted by six older neighborhood boys, and this set the tone for the theme of my life, which revolved around anger, violence, addiction to toxic relationships, rebellion against God, and a host of other ungodly thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. This didn’t start instantly, but grew over time. Shame, guilt, embarrassment, anger, hatred, revenge, etc.

The list grew and grew over time. Now let me pause for a minute. When someone is assaulted, there are many things that can happen.

It may set a theme and tone that looks similar or different than mine. But there will be damage done, that if left to grow roots in a person’s mind and heart, will grow all sorts of roots that were never meant to be there, that were never part of God’s purpose and plan for your life. But God can make all things new.

And this I did not know till much, much later in life. Let me repeat, God can make all things new, but only if we seek him with all our mind and heart. Which of course, I did not know this, so I did not do this.

In fact, I was angry with God. I didn’t want to hear about God, and certainly not about Jesus. I even doubted his existence half the time, since I never had any proof of his presence in my life, or at least I hadn’t noticed it.”

The Bible had never been opened in school, and so I learned that it didn’t hold much value. I mean, think about it. It was the one book in my desk for eight years that never was opened.

All the other books were open daily. So how important could the Bible have been to never even need to be opened? Back to my story.

I was trapped in a pattern of negative thinking, failed relationships, and isolation. I went to dozens of secular counselors, read every self-help book I could find, and studied all sorts of new age teachings. Nothing helped longer than a week or two.

I would be left worse off than I was prior. I could not understand why I would do things I didn’t want to do. The only stable part of my life was my professional life, in which I did everything possible to hide what was happening personally.

This theme lasted 40 long years.”

So how did I come to know Jesus? Well, let me tell you. If I had to describe as briefly as possible how I came to know Jesus, I would have you envision Jesus as a good shepherd of sheep, and him leaving 99 of his sheep to go after the one.

But I was not the one that was simply wandering around, lost and confused. I was the one that was beelining headfirst into sin. Many times not really thinking twice about what I was doing because, it was normal, even if it felt wrong.

Sin was normalized. And looking back now, I never really thought about sin outside of murder, stealing and cheating. We don’t really know what sin is at this point, since most sin has been normalized by humans.

But sin does lead to all sorts of troubles. Sin does separate us from God, and sin does lead to death. So here I was, the one running from God at every turn.

I was the one questioning everything, doubting everything, turning to all sorts of worldly teaching and said of God, even though I knew deep down right from wrong, even though all this rebellion made me feel shameful and unworthy. Again, I could not understand why in the heck would I do what I knew deep down I didn’t want to do. I could feel it when I was sinning.

I mean, it simply felt wrong, but I would do it anyways. It was like an addiction, like an addiction to sin or an addiction to toxic relationships. I didn’t know it at the time, but God was chasing me down.

I was truly blessed when he allowed my eyes to be spiritually opened during my last toxic relationship with the man I call my nemesis. Had I stayed in this relationship, it would have led to the death of me, literally. God let me see spiritually what was happening.

I was able to see in the spirit realm, the demonic entities in and around me. I went through a severely long period of spiritual warfare that I call the full frontal assault because I could see what was happening this time. And I’ll share those stories in much more detail in additional podcasts.

I have to say, though, this scared me straight out of my rebellion against God. I turned my face to God praying and talking to Him without ceasing during all the spiritual warfare attacks, and I really didn’t even know how to pray. I just remembered the Our Father, and I probably even got that wrong, but I did it anyways.

And it took another few years to surrender myself entirely to what I knew God was asking from me, and to obey Him without question. I left my nemesis and never looked back, and the desires of my heart started changing. I was doing a lot of work on renewing my mind and heart, as I had 40 years to rewire mentally and emotionally.

But I was renewing my mind and heart, not through new age or worldly teachings or secular counseling, but through God’s Word. And I still was not immersed in the Bible at this time at all. I was learning spiritual warfare through Christian writers that had pulled forth God’s Word, which was regarding Satan and his army of demons, because I was fighting a battle.

And for the most part was hidden. There were many thoughts, erroneous beliefs and mindsets or strongholds in my mind that had to be exposed. Many false beliefs that had to be deruded, that no longer made sense.

And the truth about my identity, the truth about my purpose, the truth about Him, God, God the Father, the truth about Jesus, the truth about the Holy Spirit, the truth about sin, Satan and spiritual warfare. I mean, my mind was blown. I felt like a cloud was totally being lifted.

And I had answered the answers that made sense for the first time ever. I understood the Hidden Battle and where my victory would come from. And for me, it was a total revelation.

But there was still something in and around me. You know, even with this newfound knowledge, I could still feel something. I kept praying and working on my relationship with God.

And yes, it was a relationship. And it is a relationship. Because Christianity and believing in Jesus is a relationship, it’s not a religion.

Religion is what got me into this mess of confusion that had no answers. Relationship with Jesus and God’s Word in the Bible, that’s what brings you out. And that’s what brought me out.

Within that year, I had a supernatural encounter with Jesus. I watched as he removed the demonic entities that were still in me. And I have the full story of this and many other experiences in my memoir.

And I will share them in detail during future episodes with you. Now, the summary of my life now. After that encounter and many other encounters since then, some are in my memoir and some I’ll have to share that are not in my memoir.

I am truly freed. I have a desire to learn more and more and more about God’s Word than I ever could have imagined. Something will happen in my life and lo and behold, I’ll seek answers in God’s Word, the Bible, and there it is under my nose, and I never even knew it.

There’s so many aha moments when you actually surrender to Jesus and truly seek him. I feel a peace that surpasses anything I could ever have imagined and my life’s never been the same. The desires of my heart have been transformed and my mind has been renewed.

All has been made new, just like God’s word promises. And I never in a million years thought that was possible, as bad as things were for as long as they were. I literally thought this was going to be my life forever.

But Jesus is in the miracle business for those that seek his face with all his, all their heart and all their mind and all their spirit. And I’m no longer blinded by the lies of the enemy. Now God’s word tells us this.

In 2nd Corinthians 4 verse 3 through 4 in the Amplified Translation, it says this, But even if our gospel is in some sense hidden behind a veil, it is hidden only to those who are perishing, among them the God of this world, Satan, who’s blinded the minds of the unbelieving to prevent them from seeing the illumining light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. So why does Satan do this? Well, Satan’s fate is sealed.

There is no redemption for him and his army of fallen angels. And Jesus came to save humans from a similar fate. He came for all of us sinners.

And yes, we’re all sinners. So this puts a target on every human’s back, right? Satan wants only to steal our destiny, to steal our identity.

And better yet, if he can, he’d like to kill and destroy us if possible, because God loves us. God offers forgiveness of our sins through Jesus to us. And that makes us enemies of Satan.

How does Satan do this? Well, he hardens people’s minds and hearts with lies about our identity, about our purpose, lies about God’s word, you know, the truth, lies that cause chaos and confusion in our minds and hearts, cause doubt, cause double mindedness, cause us to rebel, cause us to be stuck in addictions. He tempts us into sin and self-destruction slowly and methodically.

Eventually we develop a hardened mind and heart.

God’s word says this about the hardening of the mind and heart and the inability to be able to understand. Second Corinthians 3 verse 14 through 16 in the Amplified Version, it says this, But in fact, their minds were hardened, for they had lost the ability to understand. For until this very day, at the reading of the Old Covenant, that same veil remains unlifted because it is removed only in Christ.

But to this day, whenever Moses is read, a veil of blindness lies over their heart. But whenever a person turns in repentance and faith to the Lord, the Lord Jesus, the veil is taken away. We’ll dive deeply into the why and how topic in future episodes.

The most important thing to remember now, if you’re struggling to understand or simply don’t want to hear all about this, is that there is only one that can help you see and understand, and that is Jesus. He is faithful to this promise for those that ask, and I’m proof to that testimony.

Now for some reflections. Consider the areas of your life that Satan could be blinding you. As we go into some other episodes, we’ll dive into many specifics around this topic for you to consider.

Some of you may be like I was, and that you simply don’t want to hear about it, or possibly you just don’t understand what this all means. I was there and I get it.

But God’s word says in Matthew 7 verse 7 through 8 in the Amplified Translation, Ask and keep on asking, and it will be given to you. Seek and keep on seeking, and you will find. Knock and keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.

For everyone who keeps on asking receives, and he who keeps on seeking finds. And to him who keeps on knocking, it will be opened. My understanding came only when I was actively, desperately and genuinely seeking and asking.

So I ask you, are you that one rebellious or doubting sheep like I was? Why did this rebellion or doubt start? What was happening in your life?

Now for some reflections. Consider the areas of your life that Satan could be blinding you. As we go into some other episodes, we’ll dive into many specifics around this topic for you to consider.

Some of you may be like I was, and that you simply don’t want to hear about it, or possibly you just don’t understand what this all means. I was there and I get it.

But God’s word says in Matthew 7 verse 7 through 8 in the Amplified Translation, Ask and keep on asking, and it will be given to you. Seek and keep on seeking, and you will find. Knock and keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.

For everyone who keeps on asking receives, and he who keeps on seeking finds. And to him who keeps on knocking, it will be opened. My understanding came only when I was actively, desperately and genuinely seeking and asking.

So I ask you, are you that one rebellious or doubting sheep like I was? Why did this rebellion or doubt start? What was happening in your life?

What would it take to turn that rebellion or doubt around? And have you actively, desperately and genuinely sought Jesus? If not, what do you have to lose?

Hey, friends, that wraps up today’s Hidden Battles Podcast. A transcript along with additional devotionals for this week’s podcast, as well as my memoir, are available for free download on my website at goddesign.org, or check out some of my other books that you may find helpful. If you liked this episode, please share with others.

Hidden Battles, revealing what the enemy does not want you to know. Never stop praying, never give up, and I’ll see you next week.